To not play the game of life

To paraphrase a friend, "the real us is never shown as we embrace the illusion, the game." I have to ask whether this is actual truth. Do we show each potential mate/partner/friend the make believe version of ourselves? Do we play mental and emotional chess with them? Is there a dividend that we earn that makes the deception worthy?

Historically people have fallen into cliques. Whether it is man v. woman to ivy league educated male v. coal mine supervisor male, there are cliques and they are always in opposition to other ones. To break this idea down further, are we our own clique? Do we selectively allow others to see the more "real" us, as opposed to making others "earn" their way into our own clique?

From the earliest we are taught to protect ourselves against all others, whether it is the subconscious lessons we have learned from our parents to the outright lessons of childhood. We learn to hide within ourselves. We must not be different. We must be what society expects us to be. And this is bullshit.

We look within and know we are not the personae that we pretend to be. We are the source of our own existential angst. Society expects "x" and we deliver. This is why homosexuality is taboo and still kept "in the closest" in many societies. It is why the religious cling to outdated idealism like marriage being between man and woman.

Nietzsche brought the idea of the Superman forth with Zarathustra. It complete defiance of social "norms" of being what one is expected to be. Nietzsche reminds us that if we wish to be something/someone that is known for all time, to be something other than a sheep, that we need to abandon the preconceived notion of who society thinks we need to be. We will be as we will be. Fuck society.

So how do I answer the friend about hiding the real us as part of the game?

When we lower ourselves to play the game, to be who we are not, to leave vague clues for others to puzzle out, we cheapen who we really are because we allow ourselves to become common, to become sheep. When we are able to hold ourselves above all others, without excuse, we attract those who are our equals, those who understand that we must rise above the mundane and be true to our own spirit/will. To be Zarathustra.

Buddhist concept of mindfulness

There is a concept in Buddhism known as mindfulness (satipatthana). In it's simplest form it means to be in the moment at all times. A person should always "live in the moment" so to speak. Is this something that should be practiced? How is it beneficial and/or dangerous?

To be mindful, one has to have triggers to keep the mind in the moment. How many times have we just zoned out watching inane stuff on the television or while driving? Being mindful this does not happen. We have a predetermined trigger that reminds us of being in the moment, whether it is counting our breaths, an alarm, or something else, something that reminds us to be mindful. To be mindful we must see all around us, absorb and filter it, and gather wisdom instantly. This short-circuits reflecting upon past events. Not essentially a bad thing, but definitely an adjustment. The practice of being mindful requires constant vigilance. And that, to me, appears to go against what is the essence of Buddhism. How can one be mindful and be true to Buddhist principles?

Picture the scenario of living one's life in a potentially dangerous city. One is aware and aloof at once. Danger is all around, and the mind is prepared for it and scanning for it, but at the same time one is not concerned by it. One sees all and filters it into categories of normal, new, dangerous, and boring. The mind registers the prominent stuff. One is mindful.

Suggest a topic

If there is a topic that you'd like for me to write about, feel free to post it in the comments. My specialty is First School Critical Theorists, but I also love Theory of Mind, and Philosophy of Religion. But don't feel limited to those. I love a challenge.

For 2012 I plan on posting at least once a month (good plan). We shall see if that happens...

The internet burped

So the internet crashed tonight. And by that I mean for everyone in this area, regardless of carrier.  Of course the news is slow to respond. That dinosaur keeps forgetting to die.
The reason I post about this is because it reminded me of the power outtage that happened a decade or so ago in the NE US.
It was a time of zero internet. Those among us who can remember life pre-internet are getting fewer by day. Those glory days were filled with entertaining ourselves with our minds. It allowed us to form cogent arguments for/against cogent ideas. We had time to explore actual questions.
I mention this because it has become apparent that we as a society has lost something important : silence.
With silence one has time to explore one's thoughts. Time to consider other opinions.  Time to agree / refute them. Advancement of knowledge hangs in the balance.         

Integrity

"One of the truest tests of integrity is its blunt refusal to be compromised." ~ Chinua Achebe

Let me preface this with stating that I am a former chef-restaurateur (though always a chef).

Had that thought mulling around my mind today. Being active on Yelp (http://www.yelp.com/) I've known all along that one day that someone would take offense to a negative review and contact me. And today was the day. The reason that I mention this is because the person that contacted me (marketing person doing damage control) offered to have me come back to the restaurant and eat for free.

So integrity was on my mind. I knew full well that this person was only interested in damage control. In fact I was a bit offended that a marketing person reached out and not the actual chef and/or owner. Purely an attempt to "fix" things. But my thoughts on accepting a free meal would not have been swayed had the latter occurred.

Integrity means to stand behind one's words and convictions no matter the consequences, as quoted above. I could have accepted this person's offer, had a free meal, and still stood by my review. But that would have lessened my integrity. How? Because I was willing to accept money/food for my opinion. Even if I wrote another damaging review of the restaurant I would no longer have the same integrity because I had accepted what was essentially an attempt at a bribe.

I politely informed the person that I appreciated the attempt at damage control, but because of my integrity I had to refuse this person's offer. For Sartre it is "values derive their meaning from an original projection of myself which stands as my choice of myself in the world." I chose to be genuine, to maintain my integrity.